Ok I've had a couple of ideas for updating the prematch entertainment to take Superleague to the next level through New Bullmania! I'm posting it here because Stuart Duffy has stopped reading my emails after my attempts to bring MC Wiggy back to Odsal (I've given up on that one as the letters from the club's solicitors proved they've no intention of listening to me).

New Bullmania
New Hope
New Bradford
New Superleague


OK here's the plan change rebrand Bullman and bullboy as
=red[size=150"Torro and Beouf - Crime Fighting Cattle"[/size.
A kind of Bovine Batman and Robin.

They could then before every match act out Batman/cartoon style battles between good and evil against their arch nemesis -
[size=150=red"El matador"[/size
played by Steve bailey.

For example one week instead of bullmans parade Steve I mean El Matador drives round the speedway track in a pick up truck with a a large box like object on the back covered in a black shrowd. An evil laugh could be played over the tannoy as the crowd boo and hiss him. Then he could park up at the away end and uncover what is actually a cage (a veal crate? or is that going a bit far?) containing Beouf. Beouf then gives out the "International Steerage Call to Arms" (a loud moo is played over the tannoy) alerting Bullman sorry Torro who appears above the coral stand who proceeds to zip down an aerial slide to the half way line. El Matador and Torro then run at each other for a matrix/crouching tiger hidden dragon style fist fight in the middle of the pitch. Special moves - Torro has Pamplona Charge which sees him gore his opponent with his horns and El Matador unleashes The Cape of Combat. Batman style kappow and thwack sounds played over the tannoy as they trade blows (note - obviously the fights would have to be choreographed and rehed prior to match day). Obviously Torro wins as he can gore a man and all El Matador can do is wave a piece of red cloth at him which given that torro is a bull would actually be counter productive. He gives El Matador a right shoeing I mean properly goes to town on him and the crowd would fall silent as it appears a local radio presenter has been beaten to death by a man in a padded suit. But it's alright because he isn't dead as Steve Bailey then takes off the matador costume and reads out the team news.

I just think this could freshen things up and could provide an extra line of merchandise for kids as they could buy tshirts, costumes, action figures and panini sticker albums of their heroes. A feature film and cartoon series would be an additional revenue stream as well.

Just what is needed if you ask me.

I would deffo go and watch that

Something to give people a smile would certainly be welcome I'm sure!

May be a little off topic, but we could also do with a few new songs/chants which could be introduced like way back when they tannoy'd the "come on you bulls" chant.

The last thing we want is another "sing when you're told to" situation.

Genius.

If Paul whateverhisnumbersare ever wins the lottery and fulfils his promise to buy the club* he MUST appoint MBBB as creative and marketing director. No Brainer!!
[size=75
*and after he has appointed, amongst others, RER as football director, 'Varky as legal director, Bullseye as communications and PR director and me as FD on mega salaries...[/size

That would be simply awesome

Quality, if I win the club in a game of poker, as AB says, MBBB is doing the entertainment for sure.

I put £6 on the euromillions each week and for the last 3 weeks my winnings went up by a tenner. I felt lucky, until some got the jackpot last night.

But yes, I will be buying the club when I win! MBBB is a risk in that roll because it'll be MC Wiggy every week so I'll be getting FA to draw up a very tight and stipulated employment contract?

RER will be joint head of youth development with Paul Medley, and also assistant coach to the Head coach.

Bullseye will be the Communications dude but he'll work closely with Eddie, as Eddie will then be able to punch holes in everything going out to the media so that every angle is covered so Bullseye can fix it. Bullseye will also have Ewwnorfolk by his side, as Eww is an optimist and would add the spin to each release. Bullseye would have a further role as Fan Liason director.

Adey is already two shoes in for the finance director and will also be a generic 'Peter Kenyon' for the club.

DILLIGAF would be banquet director and his role would be to make sure the Bars and Food vans are serving food up to a good enough standard. DILLIGAF would test every single item being offered in the vans each week.

BullyBoxer would take on the role of squad assessment, analysing performances and pointing out what needs to improve per week to assist the head coach.

AF would be Bulls liason to the NRL.

That's all I can think of for now, but yes.. with me at the helm the future looks bright

I wanna be Ambassador, on account of I am the most skilled diplomat.

I will double up in charge of beer, for no extra fee.Who's in charge of curries, and taxis home?

Can I sweep the terraces please?

I see my talents more suited to head choreographer for the Bullettes..
I feel it is an area that I could invest considerable time in assessing and analysing their performances.

You can just come out and say I'm fat if you want!










But yes, I accept

That isn't quite what I said, the fact is that Bradford fans are probably among the quietest in the league so a song [iintroduced[/i to the fans via tannoy (as I said [ilike [/iwhen COYB was first introduced) to get them to pull together would be more than welcome IMO.

I wasn't for one minute suggesting that all chants should be started by the tannoy.

We could have done with Torro doing the Pamplona Charge on Silverwood yesterday as he is true evil.

Also what about a live recording of the Jeremy Kyle show before the match and at half time? They could do it on those stages in the middle of the pitch with Jezza walking around in front of the players tunnel patronising the poor scum bags who are prepared to air their dirty laundry in front of the entire nation for 50 quid and a night in the premier inn.


Sample Itinery

"Be a man, give up smoking weed and drinking Tennents Super T all day and take care of the kids you've fathered all over the place"

Bullman's Parade

"DNA Test, Is I da father or is it me brother?"

Team News straight from the dressing room

" Lie detector test, did my dad give you Gonorhea on our Wedding night?"

Kick Off

Half Time

Mini Rugby: Queensbury U8's vs Wibsey U8's

"Dad, I'm a lesbian and I'm moving in with your Thai Bride!!"

Great ideas Keith!

I've thought a bit about this. How about each week we re-create a famous date from history that coincides with the week of the game. E.g. re-create the Kennedy assassination with an open topped car driving around the track. Dress up Michael Platt as JFK and a Bullette as Jackie. Then after the fatal shot is fired Bullman and Bullboy can run after the killer who could be behind the grassy knoll.

At the same time have a "League of Gentlemen" face painting day when all the kids get done up as Papa Lazarou whether they like it or not.

This would be better than any first team game!