That would be because you chose to rest on your laurels after the first round, and left it to the others, taking the risk that they would not garner more points than you, but they did, toiling manfully at their stations, while you caroused the nights away, living high on the hog, and derelicting your duties. A game is for 80 minutes. He who laughs last laughs best. How are the mighty fallen. Slowly slowly=#FF0000[size=85 [... OK OK that's enough hackneyed cliches for one post- Ed. [/size

So, two days to go to the first racecard - and only one entry. Hmmmmmmm

Also, tigertot . . . I need a decision

IM STUDYING! SHHHH

I demand an inquiry. I won the first round. Was in the top ten on the leaderboard in the second round and entered a haiku in the poetry section. The only one to enter a recognised form of poetry. Surely bonus points for getting the key words into 19 syllables? Even if it was 3.

Some people have not even bothered to enter. At least I was d.



Do I need to sleep with Shania or something?

How about if I redistribute the rest of my entrance fee amongst the other competitors? Do I get to stay in then?

Begging your pardon, mine was pure doggeral.

Life is seldom fair
But haiku is not easy
Give Debaser points

Hmm. Looking back on 't thread, I believe this was your contribution:



I can't believe Shania would have ignored an entry, so presume she must have missed it. But I am not the judge. However, I shall ask.

To think you are responsible for the education of the nation's children. You Sir are a joke & a disgrace. If you spent your work time (1410) teaching our children about the evils of capitalism rather than surfing the net the world wouldn't be in the mess it is. Good riddance Paul Deacon is God say.

After my stunning poetry entry I have been resting. To decide who goes I am holding my own mini-competition. bob & Eddie have until 1700 today to explain how the hell Paul Deacon ever got a gig without using the words kick (or kicker) & organiser (or organises/organising etc). I will choose the winner, open criticism of every aspect of Deacon's game & character will be viewed as a positive. Otherwise I will kick out Eddie for being Scottish, possibly having ginger hair & pipping me in the fantasy league.

racist.







bald as a cue ball I am afraid.







GIRUY!

I've only just noticed your sig too. That's another reason






Your character assassination of Deacs better be good.

Romford, Wednesday 12/12/2012
First 10 races with SIX dogs running.
[Races with more than SIX dogs will be IGNORED
RACE... First... Second
1--- 2 1
2--- 2 3
3--- 1 2
4--- 1 4
5--- 3 4
6--- 4 1
7--- 2 6
8--- 3 1
9--- 1 3
10-- 5 1

Belle Vue, Manchester Friday 14/12/2012
First 10 races with SIX dogs running.
[Races with more than SIX dogs will be IGNORED
RACE... First... Second
1--- 2 3
2--- 2 1
3--- 3 1
4--- 3 2
5--- 1 2
6--- 1 3
7--- 2 4
8--- 1 2
9--- 3 4
10-- 3 5

Belle Vue, Manchester Saturday 15/12/2012
First 10 races with SIX dogs running.
[Races with more than SIX dogs will be IGNORED
RACE... First... Second
1--- 3 1
2--- 1 3
3--- 3 2
4--- 3 4
5--- 2 4
6--- 2 1
7--- 2 3
8--- 3 2
9--- 3 1
10-- 1 4

Romford, Wednesday 12/12/2012
First 10 races with SIX dogs running.
[Races with more than SIX dogs will be IGNORED
RACE... First... Second
1--- 3 1
2--- 3 1
3--- 3 1
4--- 3 1
5--- 3 1
6--- 3 1
7--- 3 1
8--- 3 1
9--- 3 1
10-- 3 1

Belle Vue, Manchester Friday 14/12/2012
First 10 races with SIX dogs running.
[Races with more than SIX dogs will be IGNORED
RACE... First... Second
1--- 3 1
2--- 3 1
3--- 3 1
4--- 3 1
5--- 3 1
6--- 3 1
7--- 3 1
8--- 3 1
9--- 3 1
10-- 3 1

Belle Vue, Manchester Saturday 15/12/2012
First 10 races with SIX dogs running.
[Races with more than SIX dogs will be IGNORED
RACE... First... Second
1--- 3 1
2--- 3 1
3--- 3 1
4--- 3 1
5--- 3 1
6--- 3 1
7--- 3 1
8--- 3 1
9--- 3 1
10-- 3 1

Paul Deacon? Now where do I start? Clearly the "babyfaced assasin" must have been there in order to attract all the ladies to the club. Sex sells after all and for those who tired of the Paul brothers, or for that matter, felt a bit Jimmy Saville and like the boyish looks, then Deacs was the man. So what if he was slow, uncreative, never scored any tries, he was eye candy for the poor and needy out there. HE SOLD SHIRTS!!!! The amount of Miss Deacon's we saw out there was ridiculous (even better cos it cost extra for the four letters in "Miss"icon_wink.gif.

Plus, it is quite a well known secret that he had managed to get his hands onto some rather revealing photographs that was taken of a leading club figure, in a compromising position with a goat. Basically our young assassin from across the Pennines used these to his advantage as he bribed the hierarchy to guarantee him a start every week or risk these photos being "leaked" to the media. (These very same photos were then passed onto a then "up-coming coach" who also benefitted from their existence and forged an unlikely career within the club. Ownership certainly WAS power in this case.

People were fooled by this charlatan who was not good enough for the worst Wigan side in living memory. OK so he could add the extras after 12 other men did the hard work and got the TRY in but he was no more than a glory-taker than Englands' finest rugby show stealer, Jonny Wilkinson. Both decidedly average players with a lucky gift of a decent foot and a good set of forwards doing the ugly work for him.

He was given a testimonial by the club in order to repay him for his service to the Bulls. He made about £3.50, an Irish 10p piece, three Irn Bru bottles (with 30p deposit on each of them) and a map showing the direction from Odsal to Headingley in a hastily arranged whip-round held in his honour. It was too much.

RIIIIIIIIIGHT LISTEN UP YER UGLY RABBLE !!

Following the astonishing discovery of debaser's mysterious work, which I am convinced must have materialised from the ether, but was nevertheless lodged in time, it is only fair that it be marked, as it was a valid submission.

Shania has awarded debaser the sum of 2 points. Personally I think it's very mean, since as you all know, Japanese haiku poetry is probably how I spend 95% of my time, but that is the decision.

It therefore changes the global standings and individual scores and the revised numbers are:-


The pimp 007- 6
Pumpety pump- 5
Lucky Luke 7
Mystic Eddie.... 2
Terrace singer- 5
Tiger tot- 4
debaser - 2

This gives the following Team scores for Round 3:

The Chloroform Rags A-Team - 12
The Nick Zisti Appreciation Society - 7
Paul Deacon Is God - 12

This means that CRAT and PDIG share the round's Bonus Points, and get 4 points each.

Scores on the doors to date are therefore:
The Chloroform Rags A-Team - 43
The Nick Zisti Appreciation Society 22.6
Paul Deacon Is God 28

Under the rules of the round, all team scores to date are now halved.
So the leaderboard reads thus:
=#0040FFThe Chloroform Rags A-Team - 21.5
=#BF40FFThe Nick Zisti Appreciation Society 11.3
=#408000Paul Deacon Is God - 14

These scores go forward into the Elimination Semi Final

Now for the eliminations:
Scores to date:

The Chloroform Rags A-Team
broadybull87 2 6 0 Total=8
debaser 5 0.4 0 Total=7.4
=#BF0000Pumpetypump 0 1 5 Total=6
Terrace singer 0.1 4 5 Total=9.1

This means the lowest score is now Pumpetypump.

The Nick Zisti Appreciation Society
bullinenemyland 4 3 0 Total=7
Blotto 0.1 0 0 Total=0.1
Lucky Luke 4 2 7 Total=13
=#FF0000dddooommm 0 0 0 Total=0

The hibernating dddooommm continues to eat dust.

Paul Deacon Is God
tigertot 5 0 4 Total=9
thepimp007 0 5 6 Total=11
=#FF0000bobsmyuncle 2 0 0 Total=2
mystic eddie 0 0 2 Total=2

In the circumstances of the round, and taking into account mystic eddie's eloquent plea for salvation, plus his endearing admission that it was he who contributed the empty Irn Bru bottles to Deac's testimonial, I think it would be manifestly wrong, nay, even cruel, to still eliminate any player from this round. It may just be a surfeit of the Christmas spirit, but my decision is that all lives are re-instated and all players move on to the next round.

As debaser survives, he resumes the captaincy of CRAT.

And now, this competition is so plainly going to the dogs.

Epic


Prove you're not ginger & you can be vice-captain.
Debaser should still go for his ungracious exit.

Point of order: it couldn't have been an ungracious exit, unless he had exited, which he hasn't. Perhaps your ungracious remark will serve to raise the ire of him and his team? May ye reap the whirlwind? Be afraid. . .

Proof of my baldiness and therefore non ginger-ness can be seen on my facebook page Craig Eddiemate Jardine or by confirmation from other RAB users, RTB, DILLIGAF and Leaf who can all vouch that I resemble a cue-ball.

Ah, but you [imight[/i be a ginner, and you've just shaved it off in an understandable denial mechanism. There is only one way to resolve this, but I am sure as hell not volunteering

Romford, Wednesday 12/12/2012
First 10 races with SIX dogs running.
[Races with more than SIX dogs will be IGNORED
RACE... First... Second
1--- 2-4
2--- 4-2
3--- 4-1
4--- 2-3
5--- 3-2
6--- 1-6
7--- 2-5
8--- 5-2
9--- 6-1
10-- 1-2

Belle Vue, Manchester Friday 14/12/2012
First 10 races with SIX dogs running.
[Races with more than SIX dogs will be IGNORED
RACE... First... Second
1--- 1-6
2--- 6-1
3--- 2-4
4--- 2-3
5--- 3-2
6--- 1-5
7--- 2-5
8--- 1-6
9--- 1-3
10-- 2-6

Belle Vue, Manchester Saturday 15/12/2012
First 10 races with SIX dogs running.
[Races with more than SIX dogs will be IGNORED
RACE... First... Second
1--- 6-1
2--- 4-2
3--- 4-2
4--- 2-4
5--- 1-6
6--- 1-3
7--- 2-3
8--- 1-6
9--- 2-1
10-- 6-5

If you are referring to "down there" then RTB could probs vouch for that too.....

May i ask why?

Thanks for reinstating me, it was only fair, seeing as I was right. And as captain, I had the right to approach the referee for clarification.

However, as I know nothing about horses, and indeed think that horse races is cruel I refuse to enter this round, so feel free to evict me, now that I've caused a fuss.

I smell fear.