Quote ="Jamie B"I really think McF should have his own agony uncle sticky thread on here. He's a waaaay funnier and relevant source of knowledge than those two ockers on the fosters adverts.
I reckon its the inner curmudgeon that does it.'"
Its something we have been thinking about for some time, I often despair of the stupidity of youth these days and wish to impart my hard-fought life-knowledge upon the misguided, mis-interpreted and simply bewildered in an attempt to prevent them making the same mistakes as I did.
So for starters, lets recap on the life-long Rules of Thumb...
If a female does not offer to share the bill on a first date, then that should also be the last date, for mark my words, your poor dead wallet will henceforth forever lie in a foreign field called her handbag.
Do not ever drink in a pub with a flat roof.
Do not ever drink in a pub that needs "security" on the door.
Housework is the devils work, if you volunteer to do any of it she will expect you to do that deed. for ever, that is, for the rest of your life - and often from beyond the grave too.
Shopping for anything but cake is simply unacceptable and a vexation to the spirit.
Joint bank accounts are natures way of telling you that you have just been castrated and are now officially classed as female, have you ever noticed how many women work in banks, they rule the nations finances and reached this position of power by inventing joint bank accounts.
Do not ever accept an invitation to go and live in Whitley Bay, ever.
