i know it sounds daft but how do i shave my beard off.

I have been off work with depression for 4 weeks and am due to return to work but i have not shaved for 5 weeks.
I have a full beard and have normally being clean shaven previously.
Any tips on how to get some lengthy fur off my face ( i have had all the jokes about using petrol and a match so sensible suggestions only !).

Scissors or sheers that they use in hair dressers? An easy option would be to go to a barber's and ask them to do it.

Heres 22 reasons to leave it as it is www.buzzfeed.com/lukelewis/23-re ... are-better

Heres 22 reasons to leave it as it is www.buzzfeed.com/lukelewis/23-re ... are-better

Use a beard trimmer to get it down to stubble, than shave as normal.
That's what I do.

If you're gonna shave your beard, you'd better be prepared to go to Hell.

That is probably the only sensible suggestion you have ever made on these boards

And probably a pleasantly relaxing one too.

Careful use of the word "probably" there Mintball!

Just make sure the barber's not next door to a pie shop

Or above it.

use clippers, then a good shaving lotion (not foam) and a new razer.

but if you have a local barber that uses the modern "cut throat" razers then I thoroughly recommend it.

and it needn't be hell, unless you scrape a layer of skin off your face.

Done this a few times over the years and used the 'clippers then razor' method. Works fine.

Of course, if you DIY, then you get the chance to experiment with various new looks.



Or of course pick one, and ask the barber to do it.

I detest shaving.
Am dark so it grows rapidly.
Hacking away a weeks growth with a 6 month old Bic disposable is tortuous and a challenge all rolled into one.
I use Fairy Liquid as a latherer.
Unfortunately I jest not!

George Oldfield had that "short boxed beard' photofit and he still couldn't apprehend Mr Sutcliffe.
No wonder he drank himself to death.

So it exists now?

I don't need to worry about this - as it would take me too long to ever get to any decent length where I'd have to worry about how I shave it! Once a week for a wet shave, if I'm lucky, so save a fortune in razor blades!

I had a shave today from a Turkish fella in Stockton. Very nice it was. Quite liked the bit where he rolled some tissue paper up stuck it in my ear and then set fire to it. A great way to get rid of ear hair !!

What did he do to your nose hair?

Serious question, is nose hair part of a beard? At what point does beard become nose hair?

I'd say once it is sticking out of your nose about 10 cm


At the point you become JJB.

So I've got a good couple of cms to go yet then, thanks for the advice!

I'm not sure anyone can replicate JJB's head hair style!

Of course not, silly.

I was being flippant about the fact that a lot of Christians will tell you homosexuality is a sin because it says so in Leviticus, yet they'll happily shave their beards off every day in blatant defiance of that very same book.