The idea of having an essential service such as the Fire Brigade being privatised is a scary thought. None of the essential services should be in private hands ever. This Government just seems to want to sell everything off to private companies.

too many staff, noe elf and safety officer, and no equality of opportunity or ethnic diversity, you'd be shut down in a week!

Yeh but you get to have a dance at the end of every day.

Ring 999 and be asked to
Press 1 for Police,
Press 2 for Ambulance
Press 3 for Fire.

Right you now have 6 options
Press 1 if the fire has only just started.
Press 2 if the fire has been going for more than 10 minutes
Press 3 if you think you will need more than one appliance
Press 4 if there is a threat to life
Press 5 if you wish to speak to one of our operators.
Press 6 if you have buildings insurance with Murgaltroyd Fire Safety Systems
Please wait while we put you through to one of our operators.

Sorry, all of our operators are engaged. We have now placed you in a queue and your request for assistance is being treated with the utmost urgency.
Thank you for choosing Murgaltroyd Fire Safety Systems.

This call is being recorded for staff training purposes

Won't be long before you'll need a plaque on your wall showing what insurance company you belong to, before that private fire service comes to put it out.

Oh hold on, that sounds familiar.










350 years ago!