www.guardian.co.uk/society/2001/ ... h.politics Yes there was.

www.guardian.co.uk/society/2001/ ... h.politics Yes there was.

To be fair though, it is a little difficult getting oranges to peal although I'm not sure what difference paramedics could have made other than take her to a local asylum.

Especially if it had a bell tower.

And that c*** Wigan Fan is still posting?

No, he went last week

I'll be very suprised if we ever see him, again after what he came out with.

Saddened! is more likely to be unbanned on the Wigan forum before I’m allowed posting privileges on the sinbin again. Perhaps Mr Field you could advise me on what kind of message I should send to Mintball that might get my ban overturned?

I suggest composing a PM consisting entirely of the song written and performed by Sting called "If you love someone, set them free".

At least you'll know where you stand when she doesn't.

I was grateful for that support. If this foot doesn’t get better then I’m thinking of getting a bionic one like those people who’ve got bionic hands to replace their stagnant hands. I should just buy some new shoes and trainers before then though!

No need, when you get a false foot you get to specify what size shoes it should wear, and how fast the nails should grow.

I have sent those lyrics to Mintball under the message title of ‘Sinbin ban appeal’. It could work!

Do they do legs?

You're confusing Wallace & Grommits "The Wrong Trousers" with real life again

Bugger.

McLaren

I am about to be enveloped by a domestic situation; my sister and niece (8 years old) is coming to stay with me for a few weeks, as a stopover to America. My betrothed, struggles with my niece, who is a little hyper/highly strung.

How do I tell her to 'put up with it or off', without destabilising marital harmony?

I was once faced with a nine hour transatlantic flight with THE most hyperactive 5 year old daughter in the world, as I sat in the departure lounge at Gatwick watching her trying to climb into the ornamental fountain for the eighth time the solution suddenly appeared before me in a blinding light that read "Dixons Electrical". I bought her a Gameboy with three games, the best £100 I ever spent, we couldn't get it off her for months and her teachers complained incessantly about her playing with it when she returned to school but that was their problem not mine.

If that fails then you could introduce your niece to the cupboard under the stairs, if Harry Potter has achieved one thing amongst children its the belief that locking them in the cupboard under the stairs is no longer reportable to Child Protection Agencies.

Thank you. In times of financial prudence, the Harry Potter method will probably be my initial method.

This thread will go places.

It already has Bang lad, Buying the latest games console for £100 or less is the way forward for any babysitter with hyperactive kids!

Dear Mr Field, I am feeling (lethargic, sick and headache) unwell. What is the best cure?

Dear Uncle McLaren

What medication do I need to take before heading to the Tyne area at the end of the week?

Well you wont need to take any afterwards, not a chance of you getting any form of STI.

A few days hard graft doesn't do any harm Damo.

Who appointed you as Mr Fields alternative voice piece. Self-appointed was it?

To the trampoline Batman...