His Uncle Andy might get him sorted with a couple of 16/17 year olds if the sensation isn't there anymore.

Absolutely. It seems churlish of people to poke fun. Let's just establish what's happened here. Nine short months ago, William, our beloved heir to the throne, in a fairy-tale scene that, in my mind's eye, I see in soft focus and full of shimmering silks, lace and probably rose petals, dumped a sackful up the front pipe of his missus, a Duchess from Cambridge. That in itself is no mean feat because, let's be honest, she's a bit of a minger.

In the intervening period she has, single handedly, and armed only with millions of years of evolution and the best medical care our money can buy, baked a fully formed small human that she has now pushed out of her cladger.

Name one other couple that could have achieved that amazing, wondrous and awesome miracle. Go on. Just one. See? You can't. It's just so full of amazement, wonder, awe and...erm... miraculosity.

And that's why the media are all over it.

One from the bro in law...

"The Royal Baby is said to look like Diana. All squished up and covered in blood."

That might be the best post ever.

The post after it swept the floor with it. Far more efficiently too.

10/10 excellent post

Don't know if its been said , or if I'm wrong or its changed etc .
BUT! whilst Queenie hangs on to her residence and the crown what if Charlie pops his cloggs ?

Surely then we should be flocking around princess Beatrice and asking her to get knocked up so we can see our future monarch .

You see this is what you get when you don't get a say . One day we might even end up with a mad German .

As far as I can determine, that's the one saving grace about a constitutional monarchy, it doesn't actually matter if they even have a brain, so long as they cut a few ribbons and host the occasional banquet for a murderous dictator or potentate to whom we'd like to sell something.

Australia seem to be very excited about it all.

The one good thing I've learnt from the media, that I've tried to avoid, is that of all the children born today 15,000 will die of starvation.

Al Jazeera has been a refuge of news sanity over the past 24 hours.

The BBC move main news and sport to Manchester, so as soon as a baby is born in London, they ship Susanna Reid back down to London.

Don't they have any journos/presenters working in the capital anymore?

I've just flicked channel 7 news on and they're reading the lads horoscope.

They've moved to Manchester? Jeez, they'd only been in Salford for little more than a year. It seems crazy for them to have moved again.

Don't know but the excruciating excitement she has conveyed over our tv screens the last couple of mornings whilst leading up to the impending birth has seen her drop sharply in my once highly-held estimation.

Course they do, but what with the poor dears having had to unnecessarily stake-out various locations (all day) where nothing would visibly happen, and having had to busk it through lack of owt to say, it might be that they were a bit tired and thought it was easier for Susannah to go home early this week.
TBH, I'd prefer it if they kept her off the screen altogether.

Would I be a long way off target if I hinted that your interest in said presenter was not contained entirely in the journalistic frame?

What does one take me for, a beast of the field?


[size=50Admittedly you're warm, very very warm.

[/size

And that must be the oddest thing of all. How do these astrologer frauds even get away with it? The arguments seemingly centre on the baby being born "on the cusp" of Cancer and Leo. Yet anyone who has the wit to consult any online sky chart will immediately see that the Sun was yesterday (and still is today) midway between the constellations Gemini and Cancer, and absolutely nowhere near Leo.

Yet there is bullcrap like
"[iThe Sun entered Leo (and thus the sign of Leo began), just a couple of minutes after he drew his first breath.[/i "

Er, no, the sun really didn't. This isn't up for debate.

"[iJust a few hours before he was born, Venus moved from Leo to Virgo, suggesting that babies born this week will be especially blessed with clever, inquiring minds[/i."
Eh? Ignoring the obvious question ("how come?"icon_wink.gif, no Venus didn't. Venus sits proudly on the front paws of Leo, and nowhere near Virgo.

Somehow, even though it is illegal to claim horoscopes are true, and they are only meant to be for amusement, yet so many gullible people swear by them and are duped by them, even though they are manifestly based on fundamentally incorrect assumptions about the positions of the sun, moon and planets.

The funniest thing was once I printed my own skychart at birth off and triumphally showed it to someone I was discussing this very subject with, proving beyond doubt that the horoscopes were wrong, and that whilst I am supposedly "a Taurus", the sun had in fact been squarely in Aries on the fateful day.

"Oh - i see, so you're really an Aries, then," came the winning reply. I mean, really, what's the point?

Giving birth is a natural function of the (female) human body.
It's how us humans have survived and evolved on this planet for tens of thousands of years.
So why the big fuss?



It's time to move on to something more profound... like 10 days wittering on and pontificating over the sprogs name.



Hmmm, what odd's would I get on 'Rastus', 'Ralph' or 'Dwayne'



I'm not anti Royal, far from it, but this constant press drivel is OTT.. Jeeez.

OK smara[ir[/ise, Salford may be a city in its own right but it's still a [is[/ihithole

Whats the betting Ladbrokes have installed her as Mother of the year and him as Dad of the year.

Is he walking yet !!

Who, Prince William?
Hope so, he's 31.

Tsk.
So stubborn ... typical Aries.

Many people would see that as an insult, but since I believe you're from Humberside, where being a sh=#000000ithole is aspirational, I'll take it as the compliment you intended.

Oh, now you've done it ... mentioning the malignant H-word.

We can't keep sweeping it under the carpet. When our amazing new prince - MC Ice, as I believe he is to be called - becomes [iKing[/i MC Ice I, he'll be king of the whole country, including Humberside. He can't just say "I don't want that bit". That would be like popping out of the womb and saying "I don't want that sweaty bit that separates my corn hole from my bulb sack, because it's dark, smelly and unpleasant." Remarkably similar, in fact.