Tara Fitzgerald (Gloria) and Ewan McGregor (Andy) in Brassed off:

TF. Do you want to come up for coffee?

EM. I don't like coffee

TF. I haven't got any.

"Just When I Think I'm Out, They Pull Me Back In."

Great line from the crappest film of the trilogy.
The first two were masterpieces.

''I'm gonna make him an offer he can't refuse.''

"Anti-wrinkle cream there may be, but anti-fat- cream there is not."

"He's fat, you're thin, and you're both ing ugly."

I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. C beams glittering in the dark near the Tannhauser Gate. All these moments will be lost in time like tears in the rain. Time to die.

Thats my family Kay, thats not me.

What I'm looking for is someone who can contribute to what England has given to the world: culture, sophistication, genius. A little bit more than an 'ot dog, know what I mean?

The Mafia? I've 'em.

Erroll: Well, he don't like Colin. I mean, queers get right up his hooter, you know?
Harold: After what happened this morning, you'd have to find his hooter to get up it.
Erroll: Is something up with him, then?
Harold: Well, let's put it this way. Apart from his asshole being about fifty yards away from his brains, and the choirboys playing "'unt the thimble" with the rest of him, he ain't too happy


Pool Attendant: They kept it all incognito. They're gonna collect the body in an ice cream van.
Harold: There's a lot of dignity in that, isn't there? Going out like a raspberry ripple.

I'm glad I found out in time just what a partnership with a pair of s like you would've been. A sleeping partner's one thing, but you're in a ing coma!


All from one of the best films of all time, The Long Good Friday

Jesus Christ! ..................... That's Jason Bourne.

or

What have the Romans ever done for us ?

or

Get away from her, YOU BITCH !

One for our very own [igreed is good[/i Sin Binners.



Blake: Glengarry Glen Ross.

[iThat watch costs more than your car. I made $970,000 last year. How much you'd make? You see pal, that's who I am, and you're nothing. Nice guy? I don't give a sho!t. Good father? Fook you! Go home and play with your kids. You wanna work here - close! You think this is abuse? You think this is abuse, you c0cksucker? You can't take this, how can you take the abuse you get on a sit? You don't like it, leave. I can go out there tonight with the materials you've got and make $15,000. Tonight! In two hours! Can you? Can YOU? Go and do likewise. A-I-D-A. Get mad you son of a bitches. You want to know what it takes to sell real estate? It takes BRASS BALLS to sell real estate. Go and do likewise gents. Money's out there. You pick it up, it's yours. You don't, I got no sympathy for you. You wanna go out on those sits tonight and close, CLOSE. It's yours. If you're not gonna be shining my shoes. And you know what you'll be saying - a bunch of losers sittin' around in a bar. 'Oh yeah. I used to be a salesman. It's a tough racket.' These are the new leads. These are the Glengarry leads. And to you they're gold, and you don't get them. Why? Because to give them to you is just throwing them away. They're for closers. I'd wish you good luck but you wouldn't know what to do with it if you got it. And to answer your question, pal, why am I here? I came here because Mitch and Murray asked me to. They asked me for a favor. I said the real favor, follow my advice and fire your fooking @rse because a loser is a loser.[/i

Then he goes and has his brother topped.

Car Rental Agent Welcome to Marathon, may I help you?
Neal: Yes.
Car Rental Agent: How may I help you?
Neal: You can start by wiping that f*cking dumb-a*s smile off your rosey, f*cking, cheeks! And you can give me a f*cking automobile: a f*cking Datsun, a f*cking Toyota, a f*cking Mustang, a f*cking Buick! Four f*cking wheels and a seat!
Car Rental Agent: I really don't care for the way you're speaking to me.
Neal: And I really don't care for the way your company left me in the middle of f*cking nowhere with f*cking keys to a f*cking car that isn't f*cking there. And I really didn't care to f*cking walk, down a f*cking highway, and across a f*cking runway to get back here to have you smile in my f*cking face. I want a ing car RIGHT F*CKING NOW!
Car Rental Agent: May I see your rental agreement?
Neal: I threw it away.
Car Rental Agent: Oh boy.
Neal: Oh boy, what?
Car Rental Agent: You're f*cked!

"I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass, and I'm all out of bubblegum"

"The first rule of fight club, you don't talk about fight club. The second rule of fight club, YOU DON'T TALK ABOUT FIGHT CLUB!"

"A waffer thin mint Monsieur?"

"Sit down and shut up you big bald f@ck!"

(sorry if it this is already on here, couldn't be bothered to check)

Another couple of favourite from the same movie:

"Do you know what "nemesis" means? A righteous infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent. Personified in this case by an 'orrible c@nt... me."

and one particularly relevant to some of the posters on this website:

"You should never underestimate the predictability of stupidity."

We've had a line from I and III so we might as well go the full hog with one from II.



[iThere are many things my father taught me here in this room. He taught me: keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.[/i

Opening lines from a beauty of a film just about to start on Film4.

[iOnce upon a time, there was a quiet little village in the French countryside whose people believed in Tranquilite - Tranquility. If you lived in this village, you understood what was expected of you. You knew your place in the scheme of things. And if you happened to forget, someone would help remind you. In this village, if you saw something you weren't supposed to see, you learned to look the other way. if perchance your hopes had been disappointed, you never learned to ask for more. So through good times and bad, famine and feast, the villagers held fast to their traditions. Until, one winter day, a sly wind blew in from the North......[/i

It's a Wonderful Life

Clarence: Your brother, Harry Bailey, broke through the ice and was drowned at the age of nine.

George Bailey: That's a lie! Harry Bailey went to war! He got the Congressional Medal of Honor! He saved the lives of every man on that transport!

Clarence: Every man on that transport died! Harry wasn't there to save them, because you weren't there to save Harry. You see George, you've really had a wonderful life. Don't you see what a mistake it would be to just throw it away?

Agree-cracking film.Here's another

Robert DeNiro and Charles Grodin's exchange in the train restaraunt carriage.

(Grodin first)

Mardukas : Why would you eat that?
Walsh : Why?Cos it taste's good
Mardukas : But it's not good for you
Walsh : I'm aware of that
Mardukas : Well why would you do something that you know is not good for you?
Walsh : Cos I don't think about it
Mardukas : Well that's living in denial
Walsh : Living in denial?
Mardukas : Yeh
Walsh : I'm aware of that
Mardukas : So your aware of all your behaviour yet continue to do things that aren't good for you,that sound's sort of foolish don't you think so Jack?
Walsh : No.Stealing $15,000,000 off Jimmy Serrano sound's foolish
Mardukas : I didn't think I'd get caught
Walsh : Now that's living in denial
Mardukas : I'm aware of that
Walsh : Oh so your aware of your behaviour and yet you continue to do things that aren't good for you,sound's kind of foolish to me don't you think so John?

The [ifistophobia[/i line from DeNiro is another classic.

Sometimes, I guess there just aren't enough rocks - Forrest Gump

Quit worrying. You'll be back on your knees in no time - As Good as It Gets

" Say hello to my little friend "

From the same film.

Wake up,time to die.

Travis Bickle: You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? Then who the hell else are you talking... you talking to me? Well I'm the only one here. Who the do you think you're talking to? Oh yeah? OK.

Ben richards says,killian i'll be back.
Killian says,only in a re-run.