Quote ="Ferocious Aardvark"One of the funniest men I've ever seen was Les Dawson.
I couldn't tell you what I think is his funniest joke, but here's a couple:
"I’ve got a friend who's a lion tamer. He used to be a school teacher, until he lost his nerve."
"The people next door are awful. At three o’clock this morning they were banging on the walls and screaming. Good job I wasn’t trying to sleep — I was playing my drums at the time."
"My wife sent her photograph to the lonely hearts club. They sent it back, said they weren’t that lonely."
"The mother-in-law is so ugly, when she goes on holiday, the mosquitoes draw lots to see who is going to bite her"'"
"In awe, I watched the waxing moon ride across the zenith of the heavens like an amber'd chariot towards the ebony void of infinite space; wherein the tethered belts of Jupiter and Mars hang, for ever festooned in their orbital majesty. And as I looked at all this I thought... I must put a roof on this toilet."
"There was a commotion outside, so I ran out into the street, and there I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbour said 'Are you going to help?' I said 'No, six should be enough.' "
