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10 Things for Wakey to Spend the Ellis Money On
Posted by southstander on January 11 2005 - 11:58:14

Another Floor
By John D

Just the three months after I'd heard it was a done deal, we finally got Gareth Ellis on board.

Looking at Wakefield on Boxing Day, they're really going to miss their talismanic captain. The price paid by Leeds reflects the market value for the player, but Wakefield can't use that money for salary cap calculations.

Here though are the top ten things Wakefield can afford with their estimated £200k windfall.

10. A hoe in order to remove the weeds from the Donny Road terrace.

9. A bag of concrete to fill in the holes in the Donny Road terrace.

8. A camera gantry that doesn't collapse in an hilarious Harold Lloyd manner when you stand on it.

7. Food contractors who possess a valid hygeine certificate.

6. Car parking for numbers greater than a dozen.

5. Floodlights that also illuminate the corners of the field.

4. Semi Tadulala's hairdressing bill.

3. A rebranding exercise to revert to 'Wakefield Trinity', seeing as there was nothing wrong with it, that suffixing it with 'Wildcats' fixed.

2. Another tier on the Benidorm flats.

1. Jamie Langley and Stuart Reardon.

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